OzMS :: Category http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/index.php/c4 Sun, 06 Jul 2008 15:22:26 +2000 ARTICLE @ XOOPS powered by FeedCreator http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/images/planet.png OzMS :: Category http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/ 80 15 XML for category OzMS Whats New? en admin at ozms dot org admin at ozms dot org Planet Jokes from my PC [by dizzylizzy] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2604
If you've ever had a curry, this is one of the funniest things I've seen all year. I tried to read it to the outlaw in-laws and became quite breathless! Do try reading it aloud!

Sorry about the way it is spaced.

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INEXPERIENCED CURRY TASTER

Notes From An Inexperienced Curry Taster Named FRANK, who was visiting Phoenix, Durban, South Africa from the U.S.
"Recently I was honoured to be selected as a judge at a curry cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking directions to the beer wagon when the call came. I was assured by the other two judges (couple of local Indians) that the curry wouldn't be all that spicy, and besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted.

Here are the reportcards from the event:
________________________________________
Curry # 1: Manoj's Maniac Mobster Monster Curry

JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.

JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavour. Very mild.

FRANK: Holy ****, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Indian fellows are crazy.
__________________________________________
Curry # 2: Applesamy's Afterburner Curry

JUDGE onE: Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.

JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavour, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

FRANK: Keep this out of reach of children! I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
___________________________________________
Curry # 3: Farouk's Famous Burn Down the Barn curry

JUDGE onE: Excellent firehouse curry! Great kick. Needs more beans.

JUDGE TWO: A beanless curry, a bit salty, good use of red peppers.

FRANK: Call Colesburg, I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Domestos. Everyone knows the routine by now, get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting ****-faced from all the beer.
__________________________________________
Curry # 4: Barbu's Black Magic

JUDGE onE: Black bean curry with almost no spice. Disappointing.

JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a curry.

FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it, is it possible to burn-out taste buds? Savathree, the bar maid, was standing behind me with fresh refills; that 300 lb. b*** is starting to look HOT, just like this nuclear waste I'm eating. Is curry an aphrodisiac?
____________________________________________



Curry # 5: Laveshnee's Legal Lip Remover

JUDGE onE: Meaty, strong curry. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

JUDGE TWO: Curry using shredded beef; could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

FRANK: My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed hospital treatment. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her curry had given me brain damage. Savathree saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off? It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming.
___________________________________________
Curry # 6: Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety

JUDGE onE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety curry. Good balance of spice and peppers

JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.

FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulphuric flames. I chit myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that b**** Savathree, she must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe
my butt with a snow cone!
____________________________________________
Curry # 7: Sugash's Screaming Sensation Curry

JUDGE onE: A mediocre curry with too much reliance on canned peppers.

JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of curry peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried about Judge Number 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.

FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a damn thing. I've lost the sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with curry which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like **** to match my damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it, I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4 inch hole in my stomach.
____________________________________________
Curry # 8: Hansraj's Mount Saint Curry

JUDGE onE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend curry, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.

JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced curry, neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the curry pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor Yank, wonder how he'd have reacted to a really hot curry?

FRANK: -----(editor's note: Judge #3 was unable to report)
============================================

If you're not in fits of laughter there is something wrong.....
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2278&forum=3 ]]> Fri, 04 Jul 2008 01:50:20 +2000 Re: Do I have MS? [by scottydog] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2603
Welcome to OzMS Liz.

There are a lot of pointers to MS but as Darren said it could also point to a whole load of other neurological conditions. Hopefully if you can get referred for the MRI then it might shed some more light on the subject. There's nothing worse than going through all this suffering without any answers.

Good luck with everything and keep us informed of how things go.

Gill
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2276&forum=29 ]]> Fri, 04 Jul 2008 02:01:27 +2000 Comment on PBS for Tysabri in Australia by OZMS http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2602 Thanks Christine, I had wondered how it all worked ;o)


Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/wordpress/?p=318#comment-108 ]]> Fri, 04 Jul 2008 10:19:40 +2000 Comment on PBS for Tysabri in Australia by Christine http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2601 Hi!


This is how it went for my Tysabri infusion that I got on the PBS


*Went to the Day Treatment Unit at the Royal Brisbane.
*Drug was eventually administered by the nursing staff there after a lengthy delay due to a staff up lab stuff up and staff who hadn’t dealt with Tysabri before!
*Was given an invoice by the admin staff - cost me $31.30 (I don’t have a health care card)
*Paid for my Tysabri treatment at the pharmacy on my way out of the hospital.


I expected there to be delays, considering I was the first person getting the treatment on the PBS at the Royal Brisbane. I ended up being there from 9:30am til 4:30pm. The actual infusion only took an hour, and I had to wait around an hour after that to make sure I didnt have a reaction. I’m not complaining tho, considering how much the treatment costs, how much I’m actually paying for it, and potentially what it could be doing for me!


Cheers


Christine


Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/wordpress/?p=318#comment-107 ]]> Thu, 03 Jul 2008 16:43:21 +2000 Comment on First Tysabri treatment by Christine http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2600 Wow. I’m thinking they are rationing out the Tysabri at the Royal Brisbane. From what the nurses told me, there was only four people scheduled to get it (myself included!). And I was the only person on day one receiving the drug!


4 days later and I’ve got more energy than I normally would - I’m not putting it down to the Tysabri or anything, but you never know!


Christine


Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/wordpress/?p=316#comment-109 ]]> Fri, 04 Jul 2008 22:48:59 +2000 Tysabri - Part 2 [by OZMS] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2599
This is Part 2 of the Tysabri Forum topic, it is a continuation of this page below

Tysabri - Part 1

For this sized site I think 100 (ten pages) posts in a topic is enough for OzMS, I will sticky the original Tysabri post and link them together, this is kinda good as well because today or yesterday 1/7/08 Tysabri is officially on the "Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme" (PBS)

Oh just so yas know I will not be allowing image attachments, it's not from any malice or I aint a fun person, it is mainly due to the fact that the month just gone the site used 20 gigabytes of bandwidth, I have to look at all things which may cause excessive bandwidth consumption. This plan OzMS is on allows 25 gigabyte of bandwidth per month, so while still a fair bit to go I have to start looking at ways to decrease bandwidth. So sorry Lauren no more picture attachments in this forum from now on, I will be making the same adjustments to most forums not just this one, one forum will also get deleted as it don't get used much at all, but will be replaced by some RSS feeds. This forum can still have PDFs attached, but that's all. It does not affect links to other sites or links to other pages within OzMS, just attachments.

Anyway I will explain all this again in the Site forum just thought I would let Lauren know hehehe ;o)

Cheers....Darin ;o)
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2275&forum=30 ]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 05:02:30 +2000 Re: Hi! I'm new in these parts.... [by OZMS] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2598
Welcome to OzMS Christine ;o)

Three lumbar punctures!!!, you are a better man than I am lol, never again after the first and only one for me!
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2274&forum=8 ]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 03:21:56 +2000 Re: Happy Birthday Jill !! [by wombat] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2597
Happy, Happy Birthday NoodleBean for the 4 of July, Have a great Day.
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2273&forum=1 ]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:25:08 +2000 Re: Caffeine Could Stave Off Multiple Sclerosis [by wombat] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2596
Hey, i had lots of caffeine before dx's and since, but same a vitamin D4 (sunlight) had plenty of that to but still have this crappy condition ( ho hum :0/ ) so someones trials are giving differing results. (MMM) maybe if i had the mice version of ms it would be a better outcome :0)

Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2272&forum=2 ]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:40:32 +2000 Re: New addition - Szymon [by ronnie] http://www.ozms.org/modules/planet/view.article.php/2595
szymon I am about to do a Vipassana meditation 10 day course first before thinking about the Buddist monks at Wollongong lol

same situation but still mobile walking (badly)
Source: http://www.ozms.org/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2271&forum=33 ]]> Tue, 01 Jul 2008 02:39:30 +2000